“I’m writing a note.”

“What’s it for?”

“Whoever finds it can try and save me. They can take me away from here.”

“I’ll help you. Just tell me. What to do.”

“No, you can’t help me. You don’t exist.”

“We don’t know for sure. But we’ll deal with it, alright? I’m here.”

“You’re right. Here I am. I’m not dead.”

“I’m just minding my own business. Please.”

“Why don’t you go back to where you belong?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to cause any trouble.”

“We’ll send you back to where you came from. Come on guys.”

“I’m just reading these letters, for research. And I can’t believe it. I’ve never seen so many I love you’s written down on paper. So many times. In every one of them.”

“You’re reading love letters?”

“No. These aren’t love letters. These are suicide notes.”

“Don’t I always?”

“No, there’s something else different about you. It’s like, I see you now.”

“Really, that’s a strange thing to say. What do you see?”

“I see beauty.”

“That’s not me. That’s my life. And it’s too beautiful not to share it with you.”

“But Sir, my man when he find this, he gonna beat me. You seen him.”

“Just try your best to keep it from him, give her a chance.”

“The beating I am willing to take. He won’t no kill me when I can still work. But Sir, he will take your money and it will go to waste.”

“That’s alright. It all goes to waste anyway.”

“Come on, you didn’t know then. It was a rough time. Nobody knows what will happen.”

“We all know. Don’t fucking tell me we don’t know that. It hurts enough already not being able to say goodbye. I can never forgive myself for that.

She would never have done the same to me.”

“Well, I don’t think about it. I just ask when I need to.”

“You’re blessed, do you know that? I’m glad I know you. It is true. Every relationship must begin with a question.”

“To light the candle.”

“You don’t have to, dear. She’s back. She’s back with us now.”

“I know. It’s for all the other parents. They will be reliving the same nightmare tonight.”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Wait. What exactly did you lie about?”

“You remember when we first met? And I said I would not trade my life for anyone else’s? Well, I lied about that.”

“I don’t understand. What do you mean? Why are you telling me this now?”

“Seeing what you’re going through right now, yet being unable to do anything about it… it’s not something I can handle. I just wish I could take your place. Trade my life for yours.”

“And how do you think that makes me feel?”

“I understand. But I’d still do it.”

“I’d love to. You know that.”

“But like always, you can’t.”

“Let’s not make this difficult now.”

“Take me with you then. I’ll go anywhere with you. Just say the word.”

“It’s not that simple. Anyway, you don’t need me to be happy.”

“Maybe. But I prefer the me whenever I’m with you.”

Why are you crying now? You’re doing this to me on purpose, aren’t you, idiot? You think you can go cry and make everyone stare at me now, huh?

Just look at you! A grown man, yet you’re crying like a baby. You’re a baby. Idiot.”

“I’m sorry, mom.”

“Where are we going? Wait up!”

“Hurry! Before it’s too late!”

“Too late for what? What are we running for?”

“I don’t know! Just run!”

“You don’t know?”

“Haha! Do you know?”

“Don’t let me catch you! That’s what I know!”

“Oh wait! I remember now.”

“What?”

“I was running from you.”

“Sorry son. I’m afraid there’s no courage in what I do. I’m already gone. If you know what I mean. What’s keeping me alive is simply unfinished business. Once that’s done and over I’ll be gone. Gone from this world. Gone for good.”

“And when will that be?”

“Only God knows. My life ain’t mine. It never was. Never will be.”

“I don’t get you. You make the choices in your life. If you want to, you could just walk away from this now, couldn’t you?”

“Ain’t never happened like that boy. Choice is something your mind fools you into believing that you have. Having a choice keeps us sane. Thinking we’re in control. In control enough to live like the wretched fools we are.

Let me ask you this. Would you breathe? Would you breathe so freely if you knew? That for every breath you take, you see someone else exhaling a final one?

You can’t. We gotta live like fools son. That’s the way it has to be.”

“Is she asleep?”

“Yeah. I had to read the Gruffalo, twice. We need to get a new book. For my sake, at least.”

“You’re still worried, aren’t you?”

“I can’t feel safe until the second result comes back.”

“This is quite unlike you. What happened to the optimistic man I married? Full of hope and energy?”

“Had I known the possibility of this happening, I might have let you run off with Mr Prom King. He certainly has more hair than I do now.”

“That’s not true. You could always make me laugh. You still do.”

“So you chose a balding jester over a Greek god? Should I be worried about that too?”

“Come what may. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“What’s your name?”

“Shush. You want our heads to be boxed?”

“What’s this yum yum they want me to do?”

“You’ll find out. The man with the red mark will teach you. Learn it well if you know what’s good for you.”

“I don’t like the way he touches me. Does he do that to you too?”

“You’re still too young. One day you’ll understand.”

“Okay.”

“What were they thinking, when they were in here?”

“I can’t possibly imagine.”

“But they probably knew they were all going to die, right?”

“What do five and six-year-olds know about death? What do we know about death?”

“They know only flowers and butterflies.”

“Why? What’s the matter?”

“It was the clinic. The embryo. They found out that it was actually eleven weeks old.”

“That can’t be. It didn’t happen that long ago.”

“Don’t you realise? It was ours. Ours. We killed our own baby.”